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Becoming a Life-Mate
Its not easy being a life-mate. Garou and Kin both suffer as much as they gain. While its a nice concept to think it is all, ever lasting love and everyone lives happily ever after, breeding the new generation of Garou to save the world. Its not a fairytale.Being a life-mate is hard work. To share ones life intimately is not for everyone and yet one day they come across someone and suddenly the world as they know it is tossed wide open into something more. And just because life-mates meet does not necessarily mean that they know each other as far as personalities go. They understand that they are meant to be together, but they had, up until that point, lived worlds apart. And although its a natural connection that no life-mate would want to change, since its such an integral part of themselves, its somewhat of a process to accept this and this familiar stranger that is part of their life. The first few weeks for any life-mate is a very difficult adjustment period where they learn to combine what their life has been into sharing and living it with something else, something that makes their life bigger than just themselves and each other.
Life-mates, particularly Garou, are very possessive and territorial. After all, what Garou would want to go back to a life without colour that was bleak, where they felt no thrill for anything other than a kill - a life that had them walk in a world of darkness. Yet at the same time they know they can't keep their life-mate under house arrest, doing as such would make their life-mate unhappy which is the last thing one wants for the other half of their soul.
For Kinfolk, who have lived with mostly human relations, being such an integral part of a Garou's life is a big and rather difficult deal, especially for those that may not have had much contact with Garou relatives or without much knowledge of their own heritage. Even for those Kinfolk that have lived as part of a Sept it's still a life-altering change. Suddenly they have a hint at what this terrible and sometimes all consuming Rage feels like. They can understand what it feels like to be a Garou, to have this primal way of thinking, and how the wolf is as much as part of the man. And its not only their life-mate that they must learn to cope with, but the pack that may be bound to their life-mate.
Kinfolk are acutely aware of how dark their life-mates past has been. And they, like the Garou, want nothing more than their life-mate to be happy. Being whole and healthy is a very important aspect to a dying race, and to know that ones life-mate will become corrupted if they were ever to loose this connection is a hard burden to bear. Kinfolk are not dubbed "Keepers of the Spirit" for no reason. They have a very real purpose in their life-mates existence.
As nice as it would be for a life-mate to retire from the violent and volatile duties of the Garou Nation, this isn't a choice they have. To sit back and watch Gaia die is just not something Garou can comprehend, eventually they would loose their wolf and themselves. But those Garou that do find a life-mate are not often sent on the most suicidal missions unless it is absolutely essential. With the species facing extinction, if a Garou were to die in battle the Kinfolk life-mate would soon follow, they become insane, depressed and literally loose the will to live. The Nation would not only loose two of the Nations chosen, but they also loose two potential beings that are capable of conceiving a new generation. Life-mates are the current hope for the next generation of Garou and Kin. Living such a life is no easy feat, and those envious of such matings suddenly realize what such a daunting life it can be when (should) they find their connection themselves.
** A note on life-mates and mind-speak.
This is an automatic connection between a life-mate Garou and Kinfolk. They are able to share thoughts, feelings and memories. It is very possible for Kinfolk to understand how it is to be a Garou. While they do not feel it in themselves, its through their Garou life-mate that they are able to sympathize and gain knowledge of such an existence. Garou are able to do much the same with their Kinfolk life-mate; understand a life without the Rage that bubbles inside, to see a world in colour from birth through their partners eyes.
Keep in mind this is an active process. Garou and Kin don't run around reading each others minds constantly, though technically they could - but it would mean for a very distracting life. To make this connection a life-mate need only to reach out for the other, which becomes a very natural and innate process within the first few days of knowing their life-mate, in order to make the mental connection. This does mean ones life-mate can pick up their partners stray thoughts, and often will do so. It can make for interesting dynamics.
Sharing all of this can be blocked. Thoughts can be private, though one must understand that it couldn't be forever. It takes a decent amount of will to steer thoughts away from a connection that seems very natural and automatic (spending a willpower point per scene), and then there is the question of why a life-mate would want to place up a mental barrier against their other half.
**Staff hopes this helps players get a better understanding of how this concept fits into the game and aids with playing hints and techniques. As more questions are raised we will do our best to answer them so that it becomes uncomplicated and more clarified for players. Thanks for your patience.